ADHD and Burnout: Why it hits differently

Let’s talk about burnout. It’s a word I find is often used but not always correctly. I am not talking about the “I need a nap and a strong coffee” kind of burnout. I’m talking about the full-body, soul-level exhaustion that makes answering an email feel like climbing a mountain.

If you have ADHD like me, you probably know *exactly* what I mean.

Burnout hits differently for us. It’s not just about being tired from doing too much. It’s about the relentless mental juggling, the emotional whiplash, the constant pressure to mask, to catch up, to “just try harder.” And even when we *do* try harder, it often feels like we’re still falling short of neurotypical expectations. Exhausting, right?

Why ADHDers are prone to burnout

- We work twice as hard to keep up with everyone else

- Executive function challenges make simple tasks feel mountainous

- Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD)

- The boom-and-bust cycle of productivity

What burnout actually looks like with ADHD

It’s not always obvious. Yes, there’s exhaustion. But there’s also:

- Feeling numb or disconnected from things you usually care about - people, things, activities

- Struggling with basic self-care (showering? Washing your hair? Making meals? Too much effort.)

- Snapping at people for tiny things

- That awful brain fog where you can’t even string a sentence together

- Feeling like a total failure, even though you’ve been running on fumes

So… what can we actually do?

Here’s the bit that matters most: you are not lazy or broken. Your brain just needs a different kind of support.

Some things that help me (and the clients I work with):

- Start with radical self-compassion - BE KIND to yourself. It doesn’t take much, but we can find it very difficult.

- Lower the bar when you need to - this isn’t a time for perfectionism - just think - small steps

- Find joy again - however big or small. Get out into nature, go shopping, catch up with a friend. Whatever makes you smile.

- Connect with your tribe - find people that get you (that’s why I launched The Speedy Brain Society).

Final thoughts

If you’re in burnout right now, remember: it will pass. You’re not broken. Your brain just needs a reset—and some serious kindness.

And if you’re not quite there but feel it creeping in? Take it as your cue to slow down. Start to notice the signs. Remember, not everything is urgent. Not everyone deserves your energy. As my 15 year old keeps telling me - No is a full sentence. You don’t need to explain if you can’t or don’t want to do something.

Be gentle with yourself. You’re doing more than enough. Be kind. Eat nice food - whatever that looks like to you. Take small steps.

Want more ADHD real talk, tips, and support? Come hang out with me at www.perfectlyautistic.co.uk or join The Speedy Brain Society. We’re rewriting the rules—one dopamine-fuelled step at a time.